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| Not a Christmas Card. |
My long estranged mother, with whom I haven’t had a more meaningful exchange than the $20 bills she sends me for Christmas and my birthday, just sent me torn out pages of The Far Side cartoons. About cows. Cartoons about cows. She said they reminded her of my ex-boyfriend. My ex-boyfriend from ten years ago (he likes cows). She wants me to get them to him. Get them to my ex-boyfriend from ten years ago. For her. Because, that’s a great fucking idea. And I’m sure my ex-boyfriend’s wife would agree that it’s a great fucking idea too.